With family life and busy schedules, it's easy to fall into the trap of nagging and repeating the same sentences when our children display challenging behaviours.
"Stop being silly"
"Act your age"
"How many times I have I told you...........?"
But what if I told you that there is a better way?
By engaging in meaningful conversations with our children, we can not only reduce negative behaviours, but also build a deeper trust, build empathy, and build self-esteem in our children.
All skills to take into adulthood.
When we have meaningful conversations with our children, we can also learn about their temperaments and what they are like in different situations.
It provides a window into their world.
For example, some children are full of energy in the morning while others are slow to get going in the morning.
By understanding more, we can work with our children's temperaments to choose the right times to have any conversations.
"The gift of communication is the greatest gift we can give our children."
Meaningful conversations also have many other benefits for our children.
Children can become :
More self-aware,
Build their vocabulary,
Develop empathy towards others.
By fostering these skills in our children, we are preparing them for success in all areas of life.
One of the best times to connect with our children is at bedtime.
Here are a few examples of meaningful conversations you can have with your child at bedtime:
ā¢ What do you love about yourself?:
Ask your child to tell you three things they love about themselves and three things they love about you.
Saying things they love about themselves however small can help build their self-esteem and create a deeper connection between you and your child.
(It can also be fun to find out what they say!!)
I have worked with some families and children will say they don't love anything about themselves.
Or their perception of how they think their parents see them is very untrue.
But once we know how they are feeling and the thoughts they have created we can help to support them.
I have asked children "If your teacher could use one word to describe you what word do you think they would pick?"
I have them go on to say,
"If mummy/daddy could use one word to describe you what word do you think I would pick?"
It gives you great insight and can be helpful to know where your child thoughts are going.
(This one is not always good at bedtime, perhaps when you are snuggled reading a book.)
ā¢ Be playful: Let's Count How Many Toes and Fingers You Have Before I Go downstairs:
This is an enjoyable way to get your child to think about their body and it provides the power of touch.
ā¢ What happy thoughts will you think about tonight when falling asleep?:
Calming the brain and providing some focus as they fall asleep can help reduce stress and any anxiety which equals more restful sleep. zzz zzz š
"Bonding Over Bites"
Meaningful conversations are a powerful tool that can help us build strong bonds with our children and empower them to navigate their way through life with confidence and creativity.
Try to have less time on the devices, sit down with your children, and start having those meaningful conversations.
I promise you will make some fantastic memories. :)